No Baby Yet!

I am getting so tired of waiting for this baby to come out and join the family. Every night is a whirl of mixed feelings. Is is going to be tonight? Will I get up to pee and find that my water breaks? Surely something will happen tonight? Oh well, I guess that means I am not ready yet, or that the baby needs a few more days to develop. I am really tired of my routine right now. I think I am ready for a little stress in my life! I say that now, and two weeks from now I will be dying for relaxation instead. You never can win, can you!
Poor Joe has to go into work everyday and is bombarded by the same questions he gets asked everyday. Any changes yet? Has she felt any contractions? Etc Etc Etc! I feel for him. I just don't answer my phone unless I know it is someone that won't ask me those annoying questions. Even though I am only three days away from the due date I still feel like it will be ages before it happens. I having felt a single contraction, or been super tired, or super energetic. I feel like I have been in my nesting stage for the past 4 weeks now.
I feel like when I do go into labor I will probably cry out, "NO, not today! I am not ready!" :)
Summer Camp is over til next year. Joe is glad to have some extra freedom and more rest at night. We already miss the summer staff and aren't prepared for a long boring winter. Actually, it probably won't be boring with our baby around to hang out with.
As of right now Joe is out on a run with Maximus training for his hike up Mount Rainer. It started pouring about ten minutes ago. He He He! They are going to be soaked! Joe leaves on the 23rd of September with our friend Todd Rielage from Anderson. They will be gone for 5 days. My mom will hopefully come stay with me for the time he is gone.
That is pretty much all I have for now. I hope to have more interesting things to blog about after the little one is here.

Thoughts on Being a MOM!

The picture to the left is of some wonderful women from Beford IN. Most of them are sister-in-laws, mother-in-laws, and neices and one nephew. The others are from Joe's home church, Popcorn Christian Church. We drove down to Bedford a baby shower given by these wonderful ladies. We had a great time eating and opening gifts. I received a lot of great items that I can't wait to use.

I've been getting restless during the past week. I often walk into the baby's room and pace around wondering if I am missing anything, or if there is something I can do to get my mind off what labor is going to be like. It has been hard not having much to do since I am prepared for this home birth. I got my birthing kit in the mail at the beginning of last week and bought the list of things my midwife wanted to me have at the house.

I often spend most of my time thinking about being relaxed and releasing any stress that I may be feeling in the present. My goal during the past month has been to focus on all the positives, to feel strong and confident, so that when the time comes I know the labor I experience is going to be normal and the pain is only temporary.
During my last appointment with my midwife she asked if there was anything I feared. My only fears are the point at which my contractions are so close together and the pain so intense that I will not be able to focus on using the relaxation techniques I have been practicing over the past two months. I have no fears of pushing what so ever. She said she is very curious to know how I will handle labor versus the way I handled hiking up and down mountains for 6 months. She seems to think that it won't be much different. Hiking up mountains all day long was no easy task but I don't think it wil compare to having a baby. So far hiking for 6 months is the hardest thing I have ever done but I'm guessing that will change once I experience delivering a baby.
As far as my feelings about being a mom I am indifferent. Two weeks ago I would have told you that I was not excited about being a mom at all. The last 7 years with Joe have been amazing and it is hard for me to picture our life being interupted with a new member of the family. Joe and I love the time that we get to spend together. We have spent a lot of time talking about how we will juggle time together and time with our kids. We understand the importance of nurturing our childrens' needs but also see the importance of nurturing our marriage. We both feel that in order for us to have a better than stable, crazy in love and meeting each others needs marriage, it will require us to make "Joe and Mel Time" a big priority. I want my kids to grow up seeing Joe and I madly in love with each other to be a good model of a healthy marriage. I don't want my kids to feel our stress because we put our marriage on the back burner. When kids see that their parents are in love with each other that gives them a confident and secure feeling in themselves and the life that they live in.
Being a mom is such a big idea for me to wrap my arms around and understand at this point. However, I know God gave me all of the abilities I will need to be the mom that he intended me to be.